Thursday, February 11, 2010

My Little Brother Bob and the Duct Tape Dress

The first thing you should know about my little brother Bob is that he is a con artist.

I meant that as a compliment--the kid is brilliant. As the youngest of four, he has always leveraged his place in the family to launch new schemes and money laundering operations. His petty crimes include stealing change from his siblings' rooms and having our dad exchange it for fresh bills at the bank; telling me that he could get me a "family discount" on the pepperoni sticks he was selling for a school band fundraiser if I paid in cash upfront; and of course setting up "Bob's Loan Service," a small business funded with plundered loot and offering interest rates starting at 100%.

When my other brothers and I would have parties in high school, when Bob was 7 or 8, he would figure out the choke point for guests entering the house and then set up a small table selling snacks and souvenirs for a significant markup. I'm telling you--the kid is brilliant.

The second thing you should know about my little brother Bob is that he loves duct tape.

He's almost 15 now, and sometimes when I visit him he'll hand me a fully functional cell phone and be like, "I made this out of duct tape," and I'll laugh because yeah right, who could make a phone out of duct tape? Plus he's a known con artist. But then IT'S TRUE.

So when I saw this $60 duct tape dress, I immediately thought of Bob:

And how he could easily make his own version, and sell it for $100, and convince us all to buy it. I'm telling you--the kid is brilliant.