Awesome Affordable Etsy Find of the Week: Arch Nemesis Edition

1970s Poisoning Handbook, $16

I recently acquired an arch nemesis. It's a pretty low key thing so far. Mostly we send each other ominous text messages and say, "We meet again" whenever we, well, meet again.

If I wanted to step things up though, I can think of a lot of uses for this book (which is actually a guide to known poisons and remedies, rather than the How To Poison People guide that the title implies). Here are a few of my ideas:

1. Set it on the coffee table and invite Arch Nemesis over for tea. Be sure to mark pages and write things like "Good option. Minimal foaming."

2. Run into Arch Nemesis on the street. Say "We meet again" (duh). Let book fall out of purse. Look at book, then look at Arch Nemesis. Say, "Oops."

3. Send book to Arch Nemesis's house with a note that says, "You might want to look up the antidote on page 43. Like, now."

That's all for now. I've gotta get to work on perfecting my menacing cackle.