Ooooh are they jeans or are they leggings? They're jeggings!A couple weeks ago I was hanging out with my friend Milena, and she said, "I just got these new pants that are, like, a jeans-legging hybrid, and I'm in LOVE with them!"
"Oh, you mean jeggings?" I asked, and then we both went, "Eeeeeewww!" because jeggings is the grossest word ever.
But despite our initial exclamation of disgust, for the rest of the day it was "jeggings" this and "jeggings" that--we must have said "jeggings" 400 times between noon and 6PM--because this awful little word is strangely fun to say. Seriously, say it out loud: jeggings. It's a phonetic delight.
Now, cut to last night: my whole family is sitting on the floor of a Moroccan restaurant for my brother's birthday dinner. I randomly asked if anyone else has heard of jeggings, and this live, spontaneous edition of Five Men's Fashion First Impressions happened (luckily my mom threw me a pen in time for me to record it):
Brother, age 14: What's a jegging?
Brother, age 20: No, no, we can figure this out!
Brother, age 22: Yeah, it should be simple.
Mom: I met someone once who was named after her dad who was named Stan and her mom who was named Anette, and her name was Stanette. Is it like that?
Me: Kind of.
Brother, age 14: OK, let's break this down. It's obviously a verb, meaning "to jeg." But what is "jeg?"
Brother, age 20: Grouse hunting.
Brother, age 22: Don't be a dumbass. It's obviously scallop farming.
Boyfriend: Yeah, scallops! That sounds right.
Brother, age 20: A "jegging" is the special boot German people wear to go grouse hunting.
Brother, age 22: No, "jeggings" are soft-soled scallop-farming shoes.
Me: What in the hell are you guys talking about?
Brother, age 14: Yo, this is jeggings 101!
Boyfriend: How do you hunt scallops?
Dad: Scallops are actually good little swimmers.
Brother, age 22: That's it. Jeggings are scallop-hunting shoes.
Boyfriend: I second that.
Brother, age 14: Me too.
Brother, age 20: They're grouse-hunting boots.
Dad: I think it has something to do with bird eggs. The Jaeger is a predatory seabird.
And there you have it.
